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Fanfiction: Falling in Love with Jack

Fandom: Stargate SG1
Series: Five Things
Prompt: Five Things Sam wishes she was better at
Rating: PG-13
Author's Note: Originally published on sg1-five-things.  Sam/Jack.
Disclaimer: No copyright infringement intended.  Written for entertainment purposes only.

Falling in Love with Jack

1. Enjoying him

Sam knows she shouldn’t find her new CO so funny. But ever since the Colonel made fun of Samuels in the first briefing they shared, he’s made her smile.


It’s not really appropriate though and she bites her lips and ducks her head to hide her smothered smirk when he tells the General he prides himself on his deducting skills. She wishes she was better at hiding her amusement when the Colonel catches her anyway.


She shakes her inner musings away with a wry thought that maybe it doesn’t really matter if he knows he makes her smile. After all, just because he knows she finds him funny doesn’t mean he thinks she’s going to jump him in the locker room.


2. Comforting him



She’s tried so hard but Sam acknowledges as she snuggles into Jack that she’s failed to get them both home.


The planet is nothing but snow and ice. She’s tried everything she knows to fix the DHD but it won’t work and she’s out of ideas, out of options.


When he calls her Sara, something twists inside her; a longing that she shouldn’t have to be someone she can never be.


And Sam wishes she was better at pretending as she whispers comfort to Jack before breaking and telling him it was an honour to serve with him too. She closes her eyes and waits for death to steal their last breath.


3. Holding him



Cassie’s visit helps a little in the wake of Jolinar’s possession of Sam but mostly Sam just remembers seeing the fear in Cassie’s eyes when the young girl realised she wasn’t Sam anymore.


Sam doesn’t feel like Sam anymore.


Only the Colonel is with her when Sam starts to sob so hard her whole body shakes. She wishes she was better at suppressing her tears but she’s just grateful when he simply bundles her and all her bedding into his arms and holds her through the storm.


She breathes him in; the familiar scent and touch of him steadying her as her tears subside and she thinks maybe it doesn’t matter if he knows she cried. After all, he more than anyone knows being broken doesn’t have to last forever.


4. Missing him



She’s tried so hard but Sam acknowledges as she turns away from the sight of Jack holding another woman that she’s failed to stop herself falling in love with her CO.


She’s rewritten the book on particle physics to bring him home, realising too late that what she truly wanted all along was him.


When he calls her Carter, her heart breaks; a longing for a love she’s denied for so long and can never have.


And Sam wishes she was better at handling the truth of her feelings for Jack as she absently responds to his orders as expected and falls in beside him on the way back to the Stargate. Now her eyes are open she can only hope she can get over him quickly.


5. Loving him



Sam can’t look away as his eyes hold hers and he tells her that he would rather die than lose her; that he cares about her more than he should.


Everything he has said and everything she will say is inappropriate. When it’s her turn to face the za’tarc machine again, she still doesn’t look away. She wishes she was better at telling him that she loves him without actually saying it.


She thinks he gets the message though when Sam admits she would rather he live than die for her; that she cares about him more than she should. His eyes darken to bitter chocolate because it changes nothing. After all, just because he knows she loves him and she knows he loves her back, it doesn’t mean that their confessions will ever leave the room.


fin.

Comments

( 4 comments — Leave a comment )
(Deleted comment)
rachel500
Jan. 29th, 2010 11:26 am (UTC)
Thank you for the feedback! It did go angstier than I intended. I'm going to have write a more cheerful happy ending one at some point :)
stereo_m
Jan. 30th, 2010 03:11 pm (UTC)
Lovely story, as always. I found your Aftershocks series on ff.net a while back, when I was looking for something to read before sleep... ha. I spent most of the night reading instead. ;)

Just friended you, to make sure I don't miss anything. I hope that's okay!
rachel500
Jan. 30th, 2010 06:12 pm (UTC)
Thank you for the feedback! And more than okay to friend. :)
( 4 comments — Leave a comment )

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